I may be dating myself here, but remember the commercial with the catchy saying, “Is it live, or is it Memorex?”
It was a commercial for cassette tapes that were of such high quality you could not tell the difference between the live version, and the recorded one.
A few months ago, a thought surfaced in my mind I was unsure if it was out of my own thought process, or from God Himself, in the form of a question, “Is it sadness, or is it shame?”
Is it possible 20+ years of depression is somehow attached to shame, or, the low grade feelings tied to a low-grade feeling of self-worth?
I know a few things about depression, in that it makes one sink low.
I know a few things about shame, in that it makes one feel low.
The million dollar question is this:
Could it be if I tap into the shame factor, it will be the key element to unlock this low-grade depressive state?
When we bury our story, shame metastasizes. -Brene Brown
Buried for years was the story of a little girl who walked through some dark places one should never visit at any age. As a result, these consciously-hidden scenes were buried well beneath the surface. So deep in fact, many were not even recognized by myself until recently.
Whether suppressed, or possibly repressed, the aftermath of damaging debris has affected my wellbeing. And, more than likely, a portion of my depression is related to this debilitating deficit, called shame.
We will have to delve deeper into this in another post.
Until then, what do you think? Do you struggle with depression? Is it possible, an underlying current of negative self-worth is a culprit? At least in part?